Procrastination

Entries for November 16th, 2007

[ November 16th, 2007 ]

A Public Service

I feel it is my responsibility, as a member of the online community, to inform you of a spreading disease. It affects children between ages 13-16, and occasionally, grown-ups as well. It affects a child's brain, developing until the patient starts thinking he/she is someone else, making up impossible to understand drivel, which eventually makes its way to other people. This insane rant affects other children. Your child could be affected right now.

What I am talking about, people, is the abomination of Mary Sues. Without proper guidance, teenagers who think they can write (or even those who have an inkling of writing talent) are subject to create drab, cliche, overly-powerful and 'special' characters. And the worst of them appear in fanfiction. Yes, my dear readers, your favorite anime, movie, and game characters are being raped by Mary Sues as we speak. And I mean literally. Have you seen how many 'romance' fics there are on the internet involving a Sue and a canon character? Perhaps not. You are lucky.

Unfortunately, not everyone is. Some people are now suffering from permanent brain damage from reading these atrocities, and sadly, some carry the disease and spread it. Children who thinks writing these Sues are okay start writing them as well, and the chain continues. The worst of the Sues, however, are self-inserts. But we will not go into that. The self-insert stage is a normal occurrence in most children. However, if this continues into adulthood, we know we have a problem.

It is not too late, however. Protect yourself from this plague by avoiding pits of cow dung (http://www.fanfiction.net/). If that is unavoidable, ~~pour bleach into your brain~~ read a better novel, and then drown yourself in liquor. If you have the time, ~~flame the damn author~~ give the poor child who creates Mary Sues a long, informative review. It is not a sure solution, but it's a solution nonetheless. We should all do our part.

We can all make a difference.

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